God is waiting to clean your slate. Ask him to clear your conscience.
“Forget about
what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m
about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There
it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands” (Isaiah 43:18-19 MSG).
How often do you play the “If only” game?
- If only I
could do it over again.
- If only I
had listened sooner.
- If only I
could erase the past.
- If only I
could forgive myself.
- The thing to remember is that no one is perfect. We all have
regrets. We’ve all made bad choices and said foolish things. We’ve all
wasted time and hurt ourselves and others.
-
How do you release your regrets? In my experience as a pastor,
I’ve seen several strategies we tend to use that simply do not work:
- You try to bury your past. Burying
the past will never help you get past your regrets. You can try to
minimize (“It wasn’t a big deal”), rationalize (“Everyone does it”), and
compromise (lower your standards), but your regrets are still there, and
if unresolved, they’ll keep coming back to haunt you over and over again
like a creature in a horror movie.
- We blame others. This tactic is as old as Adam
and Eve. When Adam sinned, he took it like a man: He blamed his
wife! We use blame to balance out our guilt.
- We beat ourselves up. We try to pay for our
guilt unconsciously through illness, depression, setting ourselves up
for failure, and other forms of self-punishment. The problem with
beating up on yourself is this: Your conscience never knows when to
stop! Some people spend their entire lives in
self-condemnation.
What does God want you to do with your regrets instead?
- Admit your guilt. Own up to it. Don’t make
excuses. “A man who refuses to admit his
mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes
them, he gets another chance” (Proverbs 28:13 TLB).
- Accept Christ’s forgiveness. He’s
waiting to clean your slate. Ask him to clear your conscience.
Romans 8:1 says, “There is now no
condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (NIV).
- Forgive yourself, and focus on the future. “Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over
old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new.
It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road
through the desert, rivers in the badlands” (Isaiah
43:18-19 MSG).
Talk It Over
- Do you
tend to minimize, rationalize, or compromise your regrets?
- Is it
possible to focus on the future without releasing your regrets? Why or
why not?
- Why would
a refusal to admit your mistakes keep you from being successful
(Proverbs 28:13)
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